On Being Cheap vs. Not Cheap

This is just a rambly, random, state of the Kat post.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am first to describe myself as cheap. I think it is a good thing, it means I don't have a lot of financial problems, and it means that I don't have any destructive spending habits that could become troublesome.

But I realized, a while ago, that being cheap was interfering with my enjoyment of life. I was cutting myself off from a lot of enjoyable things in the name of cheapness. Ironically, being cheap was eating up all of my available spending cash, and so I never thought the solution to the problem would be to be...well....less cheap.

For example, I love to knit. This will highlight a little bit of one of my previous posts. I have always paled at the mere idea of spending $60 or $100 on ONE SWEATER. OMG. And so, I would look longingly at beautiful sweaters and try to sub in the yarn for some really cheap stuff. Then one of two things would happen. I'd either make the sweater and be disappointed, or I would just end up NOT making the sweater because by the time I subbed out anything that cost more than $3 a skein it wasn't the beautiful project I had wanted to make.

And so, I built up quite a bunch of yarn. Not as much as some of the other ladies I know, but quite a bit of it. It wasn't beautiful yarn I loved to pet and wanted to knit with. It wasn't something I couldn't wait to use. Rather, it was a bunch of yarn that I had consigned myself to Do Something With Already so that I could move on to a project I would enjoy more. It was a good thought, but unfortunately it did not work that way. There was always a new (cheap) skein worming its way into the bunch.

One day I realized, this is a HOBBY. Why am I putting off doing the things I really want to do because I have $30 invested in crappy yarn that I don't want to use? Why am I telling myself I must use up that Red Heart yarn before I can buy a single skein of something nicer? I am not that poor. I can afford to buy nice yarn.

I realized I had some issues with quantity over quality. I would choose 3 pairs of so-so jeans over 1 pair of really excellent fitting jeans. I would choose a whole mess of clothes that were okay from Wal Mart rather than 1 nice dress or pair of pants from a nice store. I would see a beautiful garment in Ann Taylor and then go to Target and buy $200 worth of clothes that I didn't love as much....all the while wishing that I could have that Ann Taylor outfit, and all the while trying to console myself that I actually had made a better bargain; I got 3 outfits for my money rather than just one.

Sometimes, that is good. When you need a lot of clothes, or if you really like those Target clothes, it's a smart move. But if what you really want is something else, it's not a very prudent move. I believe in our society we are conditioned to go for a whole bunch of something not-so-great over a small amount of something wonderful.

And so, based on these thoughts, I decided to stop myself whenever I was cheaping out. I decided to buy the nice Koigu yarn instead of the Lion Magic Stripes. I decided to buy the fancy feta cheese instead of omitting it from the recipe. I decided to buy the nice bakery bread and the good cuts of meat rather than the Wonder Bread and the cheap cuts of meat. I decided to buy the good tomatoes instead of the ones that don't taste good. I decided to buy the one dress with the twirly skirt that I loved rather than the outfit I didn't like as much at Wal Mart. I decided to buy the nice beads from the bead store rather than the cheap ones from Michaels.

And then, I realized....I was spending....less.

How could this be? I had spent so much of my life figuring out the pennies per ounce and skipping the fresh tomatoes in favor of canned. I had been passing up the delicious baby potatoes in favor of the bigger (cheaper) bag of the big ones. I had been missing out on good feta cheese, and nice yarn, and pretty beads....and I had been spending MORE for the dubious privilege of buying things I didn't really want.

The worst part of the realization though, was I realized that those second-banana purchases were not things that I ended up using. I skipped the tender baby potatoes and bought the big ones to save money....and the big ones ended up rotting in the vegetable bin. I skipped the nice yarn in favor of Red Heart, and then beat myself up over having all this Red Heart I didn't even want. I bought bags of cheap beads, all the while congratulating myself on being so money smart, and never used them. I would have used the nice ones!

The moral of this story is that sometimes, the cheap comes out expensive. It is better to buy something that costs a little more that I will use and love and enjoy, rather than something that's cheaper that I won't. The point of things is to use and love and enjoy them, not stockpile them. No one gets any enjoyment out of a big pile of yarn they don't like. Isn't it better to get enjoyment from those yummy soft socks, that cost LESS than the bad yarn? Isn't it obvious?

I will treat my friends to pizza.
I will buy the nice spices.
I will buy the good cheese.
I will buy the good wine.
I will buy the steak.
I will buy the Koigu.
I will buy the nice dress.

I have discovered it is better to eat less expensive vegetarian meals a few nights a week so I can afford the nice stuff for the other nights, rather than eat mediocre stuff all the time.

I have discovered it is better to have one dress I really love than 10 dresses I don't.

I have discovered it is better to take my time on a nice project than make a whole bunch of fast projects out of yucky yarn.

I have discovered that things are for using, not for storing. Use your best vase today, for tomorrow it may be broken. Or you may realize you always used the second best one rather than the one you really loved, because you were so afraid of breaking the one you really loved, and you find one day you never got to enjoy your nice vase.

Use the china. Eat the steak. Drink the wine. There is nothing more worth celebrating than today.

God bless.